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英語(yǔ)幽默故事三則
下面是yjbys網(wǎng)小編為大家?guī)?lái)的英語(yǔ)幽默故事三則，希望大家能夠能在快樂(lè)中學(xué)習(xí)，在學(xué)習(xí)中快樂(lè)~
1.Bragging 吹牛
Three famous surgeons were bragging about their skills. "A man came to me who had his hand cut off，“said one. "Today that man is a concert violinist."
三名著名的外科醫(yī)生在吹噓著各自的高超醫(yī)術(shù)。其中一個(gè)說(shuō):“有個(gè)人切斷了一只手，他來(lái)找我治療，如今，他已成為音樂(lè)會(huì)的小提琴手。”
That's nothing." said another.“A guy came to me who had his legs cut off. I stitched them back on，and today that man is a marathon runner."
“那有什么，”另一個(gè)不服，“有個(gè)家伙的兩條腿全斷了，我給他接上了�，F(xiàn)在這家伙是馬拉松運(yùn)動(dòng)員。”
"I can top both of you，"said the third. "One day I came on the scene of a terrible accident. ,There was nothing left but a horse's posterior---and a pair of glasses. Today that man is seated in the United States Senate. "
“你們倆都比不上我。”第三個(gè)人說(shuō)，“有一天，我被叫到一起事故的現(xiàn)場(chǎng)。當(dāng)時(shí)那兒什么都沒(méi)留下，只有一個(gè)馬屁股和一副眼鏡�，F(xiàn)在那個(gè)人就坐在美國(guó)參議院中。”
2.Wrongly dressed 穿錯(cuò)了
I wanted to look especially nice when I valked my son to his first day of kindergarten，so I took the liberty of borrowing an outfit from my younger，more fashionable sister，who was staying with us at the time. We had agreed not to borrow from one another without asking，but she was asleep，so I slipped some shorts and a shirt out of her drawer silently，planning to put them back before she woke up.
在陪兒子上幼兒園的第一天，我想打扮一下自己。我打算從妹妹那兒借身外衣，她年徑而且時(shí)髦。妹妹和我們住在一起。我們有約在先，不經(jīng)過(guò)對(duì)方的同意不能拿別人的東西。但那時(shí)她仍在睡覺(jué)。于是，我從她的衣拒里輕徑拿走幾條短褲和一件村衣，本想趁她沒(méi)醒來(lái)時(shí)再放回去。
To my surprise .she was awake when I got back, but she didn't mention the clothes. We chatted about Jason's introduction to kindergarten. Finally，she smiled and asked coolly，"And how did Jason's teacher like my pajamas?"
讓我吃驚的是，當(dāng)我送兒子去幼兒園回來(lái)后，妹妹已經(jīng)醒了。但她沒(méi)說(shuō)衣服的事兒。我們聊了聊兒子吉森在幼兒園做自我介紹的情況。最后，妹妹笑著并不動(dòng)聲色地問(wèn):“吉森的老師覺(jué)得我的睡衣怎徉?”
3.Dating for mother 為母親約會(huì)
When the young waitress in the cafe in my building started waving hello every day，I was flattered. She was at least 15 years younger than I.
在我工作的大樓里有間咖啡館，那兒的女招待每天見(jiàn)到我都向我打招呼。我因此受寵若驚。要知道她至少要比我小15歲。
One day she waved and beckoned to me. When I strolled over，she asked，"Are you single?"
有一天，她見(jiàn)到我后，朝我招手示意讓我過(guò)去。于是，我便走了過(guò)去。她問(wèn)我，“你現(xiàn)在是單身嗎?”
Why，yes,"I replied，smiling at her broadly.
“對(duì)，是單身。”我滿臉堆笑地說(shuō)。
" So is my mom，”she said.”Would you like to meet her?"
“我母親也是，”她說(shuō):“你愿意不愿意見(jiàn)見(jiàn)她。”
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